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Monday, March 28, 2011

Hallways and Sisters.

I don't like 'em. Hallways? Yeah, not too fond of them. They are really narrow high-traffic areas. Do you know what that means The carpet on them is not fluffy at all. It's like my hair in the morning. Unattractive, scary to look at, and even worse when you have to make direct contact with it. Hallways are also the worst place to sit to attempt to check Facebook. 

My internet sucks, let's leave it at that. Maybe it's my fault. Yeah, it's my fault. I can't connect to my internet unless I am no more than 15 feet away from the router, which is currently in my dad's room. Um, so what do I do? I spend hours in front of my sister's door, which is conveniently in front of my dad's room. Fun, fun, fun, fun. 

We've all gotten used to it, really. See, the first time I did it, my sister didn't know I was sitting there. She was listening to music in her room, and opened the door. She screaming when she saw me dancing to my wonderful lonely party playlist. I screamed back. We didn't stop for a while. So it's just my sister and I, both screaming, while a love ballad by Mariah Carey is playing in my head. Our encounters often end up like this.

Just one side story? Please? Cool. One time last year, I believe, I felt like dolphin-wailing in front of her door. I positioned myself, I remember this much. And I says to my sister, I says..."WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA." She replied! We continued our screaming until my dad got fed up and banged on the wall to shut us up. I wish I could say he replied with a dolphin wail, too, but no. He is on another level, yo. 

Another side story? I'm probably not supposed to disclose this information...but I will. So my sister got in trouble recently with the Dean of Students at her middle school, my old one. Apparently, her and two other girls were involved in drawing an extremely graphic picture, with highly offensive language. So my parents had been flippin' shit. They thought it would be all over her high school applications. She'd have a record. She'd be restricted from going on the huge 7th grade field trip. The Dean even said that this was the WORST thing she had seen in all 30 years of her teaching. Mind you, she also has a freshman son who is... rambunctious. So my dad gets called in to have a private meeting with the Dean and all. Protocol and all dem good stuffs. 

She owned up to her portion. So did the other kids. She spent a good 30 minutes weeping in her room because everyone in the house was pissed at her. It was terrible. But...what did she do? What exactly did she draw?

Two sticks figures. One was sniffing the other stick figure's butt. That. Yeah. The Dean was pissed over two stick figures. Catholic schools, huh? Ok, to be fair, the other girls depicted sex acts involving stick pornography. Yeah, I still probably shouldn't have revealed that, but it was hilarious. My family spent about an hour afterwards laughing at it while my sister sat silently...

Hallways still suck, ok? 


  1. I have to sit right next to the router, too! I am right now, actually. Heh.

    Catholic schools are rather rigid sometimes... Sigh. No fun is had there.

  2. YOU. You walk down the same path towards Internet Liberation. I propose we arouse the interest of other peasants, serving the master known as the Router in an absolute monarchy. LONG LIVE THE REVOLUTION, AAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYGGGGH. Thank you, Miss KTG, for reading and commenting.

    An update, rather unnecessary, but somewhat interesting: she is not permitted to attend the big 7th grade feild trip to San Antonio, and it appears that the girl who ratted her out never liked her and her older sister is in our grade. HUZZAH!

    Peace be with you.

  3. I have internet in my entire house at my moms, except for in my room. Because of this I used to spend a lot of time on the couch with my computer, or outside Alexander's room after he would banish me. Now that he's gone, I use his bed. Can I just say how awesome it is that you guys speak dolphin wail to each other?? So cool.
    Stick pornography? how does that even work?
    I never got sent to the principal for anything that weak saucy. Once the principal came to me, because I got in a fight and the teacher was scared to break it up. Apparently I can be intimidating. By the time he got there I was done and the other kid was in tears...